Fatty Travel: Part II

I really need to stop packing so much food

As many readers know, I blogged previously about my traveling experiences with the beefy community. One of the objectives in writing that post was to reinforce the idea that our community needs to move past the computer screen and into real-life experiences, as an important step to really be able to call ourselves a "community." Also in that post, I provided some ratings of cities that I had visited in the U.S. and my sense of the beefy community there. However, I had to speculate about European communities having never been able to previously assess whether beefy meet-ups were possible. This past month, I traveled to 5/6/7 countries (7 if you consider Northern Ireland, Scotland and Britain different countries) and 14 cities, so it is now possible for me to report back on my travel experiences and my sense of the communities and gaining possibilities there.

Several months before my trip, I posted a detailed itinerary of my travel dates and locations on several prominent beefy sites. The goal was to give folks enough time to see my itinerary and get in touch should they desire. And for the most part, this worked well. I received messages from every country I visited and most of the cities. Some were quite excited about my visit, inviting me for beers and belly rubs. Other messages were less enthusiastic and more cautious/curious, wondering why I was visiting and who else I had planned to meet with. This latter question intrigued me, as there seemed to be a sense of nosing around, perhaps because I was intruding on pre-established networks in different regions? Maybe, on some level, that was viewed as threatening? I just found it odd, because when people visit me in NYC, I don't ask who else they are planning to meet. I assume they've made multiple contacts because there is a big (heh) gainer community here.

As the travel dates neared, I began to make actual plans to meet with folks. And this is where the real proof in the gainer pudding would become evident. Would people actually meet up, especially with a foreigner traveling a great distance, or would they flake? Also, what were the countries and cities like for gainers and admirers? Below are my experiences, and a bit of additional information about the regions I visited.

Scotland. Glasgow was my first city and I was a bit jetlagged, so I just pitched back a few beers after exploring some of the city and called it a night. However, night #2 led to a wonderful meet-up of two beefy buds, both of whom traveled quite a distance to be there. To be fair, one was in town from London on business, but still. The other traveled quite a ways via bus to get there. I met one other non-beefy guy that day who also joined our impromptu party, and it was a smash. We drank and chatted and discussed some strange band called "Steps" whom I'd never heard of (yet they continued to follow/haunt me the rest of the trip). Food was delicious and very fried, including yummy fish and chips. Glasgow turned out to be quite fun.

In Edinburgh, I was fortunate to have an enthusiastic beefy bud arrange to meet me shortly after I arrived, and he kindly gave me a tour of city. That night we had another meet-up, with two beefy members in attendance. We dined on delicious pizzas and plenty more Scottish beer, and danced the night away. Sadly, we never ended up getting those fried Mars bars that we had planned, but that will be first on the list for my return visit. In short, Scotland turned out to be a gainer friendly community. Lots of beer bellies in plain sight, fried everything on the menu, and some folks who were eager to meet, even if it meant traveling long distances. Some others did flake out at the last minute, but they were quickly forgotten as others were more than willing to make the effort.

Ireland. In Belfast, I was visiting a good friend during my stay here, so it wasn't entirely a beefy trip, but there were plenty of available times and bar stops where beefy meet-ups might have happened. Sadly, none did. According to my friend, Ireland seems to be quite closeted in terms of gayness; apparently that also extends to its "gainerness". Belfast does do a mean fish and chips and Guinness stew with mushy peas, which come in titanic proportions (see what I did there?).

In Dublin, I was again fortunate to have a beefy guide upon arrival, who showed me around on a rainy day of my arrival, and again on a sunnier second day. Both nights, we were able to get other folks to come join us, for beers, rubs, good conversation and dancing. It turned out quite well. Similar to Belfast, I noted there was still some reluctance by others to meet up. There still is quite a bit of closetedness in Ireland, gaining included. A few guys who were super eager to meet me vanished from sight as soon as I landed, elusive pudgy Leprechauns that they were.

Overall, Ireland scores reasonably high with me, for some tasty food, delicious beers, and some reliable beefy members. The clubs even seemed to be a safe haven, as shirts started coming off and bellies were rubbed amidst the non-gaining civilians, yet no one seemed to care so much. Now if Ireland could just shed some of its closetedness, it would really be a great destination.

Netherlands. Amsterdam is one of my favorite cities, although it tends to be quite a fit city due to constant biking and walking. However, there is also lots of partying there, including perpetually high tourists stumbling out of smoky brown cafes and tipping back beers. The eye candy is delightful. Just pick a cafe table, order a delicious Dutch or Belgian beer, and watch the bellies parade by. I didn't meet with any gainers here, but in truth I was preoccupied with the boyfriend and other friends. I did have a few guys who reached out to be beforehand however, suggesting it could have been a beefy-rific good time. Although Dutch food isn't exactly the tastiest cuisine in the world, they have lots of other delicious foods well respresented, including some yummy döner (my favorite is when they put french fries in as well. Mmmm). I would rate Netherlands pretty high on destinations for gainers. Although the fat gainer would most certainly stand out in a crowd here, there seem to be ample admirers and the Dutch don't seem hestitate to meet up (more on that later).

Switzerland. I visited Geneva, Lausanne, Neuchatel, Bern, Interlaken, Lucerne, Zurich and Stein am Rhein with the boyfriend. Again, because I was traveling with him, meeting up beefy guys for much more than a beer wasn't really in the cards, but I was curious if any would still venture out simply to meet and greet. Basically, I summarize all the above cities into one because the gainer community was completely non-existent. While a few folks from these cities messaged me, no one was willing or interested in meeting up. A few didn't even want to share their face picture. (Hard to spot someone in a bar from their belly alone). Too bad the gaining community seemed so unwilling to leave their chalets, because Switzerland has got some of the most delicious and inexpensive chocolate around (about the only thing inexpensive there). Add some fondue to that experience and some tasty Swiss beer, and you have the makings of a great gainer experience. Instead, I soaked in the landscape, which is where Switzerland really shines. It's a beautiful country, with majestic soaring mountains plunging into pristine blue-green lakes. Just for the scenery, it's well worth seeing. But if you're looking for a beefy vacation, Switzerland is very expensive (even more expensive than Manhattan!) and the beefy community seems reluctant at best.

Germany. The Germans were, as a whole, much more communicative with me about meeting up, including a few in Frankfurt, my first destination. These never happened in Frankfurt, however, so I'm not sure what to make of that. To be fair, we did meet with a friend who showed us around the city which keep me pretty busy. But I also got a few messages about being "too busy" to meet and other excuses. Nevertheless, I distracted myself with sightseeing, and inexpensive wursts and yummy beer. The food was refreshingly cheaper than Switzerland, so the gaining potential is quite nice. I found many German guys, even younger ones, sporting budding beer bellies, attesting to this fact.

Enjoying the German version of
Duff beer. *urrrrp

In Cologne and Dusseldorf, the cities themselves turned out to be the least interesting part of the trip, because the cities seemed a bit dull, and also because so few beefy friends actually tried to meet. Yet this location was second only to the London area in terms of the volume of messages I received. However, despite the general flakiness, I was thrilled that I got to meet with an encourager who traveled from the Netherlands to meet me, as well as a long-time German gainer friend was able to meet up. And we had a royal time. Tipping back massive glasses of dunkel bier, getting progressively more tipsy, and finishing it off with a massive platter of schnitzel. So that was just delightful. It is interesting that both people traveled long distances to make it happen, but those in the immediate area did not. The one exception is a chub I met at a bar, who as it turns out, was a member of BiggerCities -- but that was simpy a random meeting. I wouldn't rate this region very high given the general aloofness of the community -- despite the vast number of gainers there.
Next stop was Munich, and similar to the above, there was a number of messages from beefy guys in this area who wanted to meet, but none made the effort. Too bad really, because Bavaria is so rich in tasty food and even tastier beer. You can beat your beer belly to the "Oompa" bands while raising your stein and bumping bellies with cute straight guys who are deliciously hammered and irresistibly touchy-feely, more so than they would allow under sober circumstances. So I definitely had a great time, but no beefy meet-ups. Nevertheless, at this point in the journey, the belly was definitely starting to weigh heavier. All this fine beer and fried schnitzel-ness was having an impact.

The last stop was Berlin. This was a very interesting city to visit. It has some real interesting history,  particularly the last century, which kept me quite busy with sightseeing and museums. The nightlife is a bit bizarre for me, to be honest. Whereas in NYC only a few bars have darkrooms or labyrinths for sex, Berlin seems just the opposite. I always find those places creepy and bizarre, guys standing there like zombies moaning and groaning in the dim light, guys fucking and slurping, like creepy zombies standing around wanking. (I think I've seen to many episodes of the Walking Dead and just find the whole thing preposterous.) But anyway, no beefy meet ups from Berlin, but I did have an admirer travel all the way from Netherlands (a 6 hr train ride!) just to see me. If you're getting the sense that guys in the Netherlands are eager belly/beefy fans, then we're in agreement.

German beer belly

In summary, I was disappointed in the German showing during my trip, and it was quite surprising considering how many I have befriended over the years, and also the sheer number/girth of them on Grommr and similar sites. In five cities over 9 days, I only met one beefy German. Perhaps its the German work ethic that kept them home -- many stated they had too much work or early work schedule. Overall, I can't rate Germany very high for its beefy friendliness and community building, because it was pretty much nonexistent. It does rate high for excellent pastries, sweets, cured meats and beers, however, with which I occupied myself fully.

United Kingdom. The only English city I visited was London, the last city on my month-long trip, and to be honest, I was beyond exhausted. Drinking beer for a month, getting less sleep than usual, and schlepping from city to city does take a toll. On the other hand, the London gainer community seems vibrant and actually willing to meet up. Screw the fatigue, I told myself, get out there and have fun. And so I did. Met with beefy buds every day that I was there, and I even managed a rendezvous with a ridiculously sexy Brazilian bartender who had that small but evident underbelly that would hang over the counter when he made drinks or peek out when he stretched, seductively capturing my attention. Mercy! I couldn't have planned a better ending to my trip, and as a city, London is just great when it comes to beefy. An active community that is eager to meet up, lots of food choices, and some really yummy beer. I would place London on par with New York City and Chicago at this point, in terms of its beefy friendliness, sense of community, and availability of delicious foods.

So that sums up my tour of some European cities/countries. I should mention that in reviewing my sense of gainer friendliness/activity in each city, I tried to take into account whether it was a weeknight/holiday or some other obstacles would make it difficult.

But let me digress slightly for a rant. It was disappointing to see that, just like America, there are some beefy members who flirt and aggressively pursue the idea of meeting up, yet flake out or ignore when the time approaches. I guess this is a universal thing -- the beefy flake. This is childish behavior, like shyly peeking around the lockers in grade school to spy on your crush, then running away. Man up guys, and get out there to meet your beefy friends and idols! The most disappointing was a friend I've known for a few years now, having spent hours upon hours chatting and sharing our lives, yet he suddenly became too busy to meet...even for a coffee, a beer, or a quick handshake. The only way this community will become more vibrant and healthy is when people start treating others with respect and not just an online fantasy object. End rant.

Classic European look on right, plump ass squeezed into skinny jeans

Europe is certainly an exciting destination for the beefy community, and I am thrilled to see so many members online from those countries. American fast food is everywhere in those countries, aiding the gaining process, but now there are lots of European companies competing and doing quite well. And the sweets and pastries...my goodness, so delicious, and so readily available. Everywhere I looked on this trip, I saw herds of porky guys, sightseeing, goofing around with mates, going to work or uni, or pounding beers, their bellies pushing out their shirts, and their butts and thighs bulging their skinny jeans.
It reminds you that sightseeing is more than just viewing monuments and edifices.  :)