Fatnesse F.A.Q. for Future Fatties

I get a fair amount of messages from curious fat admirers and future gainers asking me questions about my gaining journey. Most of them are from fans of my videos, and a few from gainer websites or from this blog. I love to respond, although it does get repetitive sometimes. So I figured why not post some of the most common questions I receive, and my answers to those questions. Below are the top 10 most common questions I receive. Actually, the most common questions are those that ask me to wear certain clothing items in my vids, not wear certain clothing items, do/eat things on video, or make videos for Xtube. For your sanity and mine, I will omit those from the list. :-p

1. When did you first know you liked fat bellies?

An example of what my friends looked like

I first noticed bellies when I was about 6 years old, and a few of my friends at school had already developed slightly pudgy midsections while I had xylophone ribs and a concave abdomen. I found the difference fascinating, and as I managed to glimpse fat on another boy's body over the subsequent years, I became more and more attracted to it. I talked about this in greater detail in a previous post, Fascination with Fat, so I won't go into it too much here.

I will reiterate, however, that bellies have and will always be my primary source of attraction. I mentioned in Fascinated with Fat how I was quite confused over my sexuality through much of my teens and 20s. I liked bellies on guys, not girls, yet I found I wasn't really all that attracted to other *parts* of guys. I found guys to be quite awkward in appearance, actually -- except for those lovely round, plump, pudgy bellies...artistry in motion. It was not until later in my 20s did I finally accept that I was gay, and while bellies remain the biggest part of my sexual attractions, I have learned to appreciate other parts of the male form. This was a huge obstacle for me to overcome, sexually and psychologically. And I find many young guys who message me are also struggling with this. While I can't comment on others' sexualities, I can say definitively that bellies defined my sexuality, and I am proud to be a fat admirer and gay. I wish others well on their journey to discover their true sexuality.

I know it is very difficult. For example, I have a couple of young fat-admiring friends who message me every few months, talk about how difficult it is for them to love bellies yet feel they have to stay fit and date girls, and then they disappear again for a few months before reappearing again. I feel bad that they are going through this, especially since I went through the same struggle myself, but there is little I can do. They will need to come to grips with their belly attractions on their own, hopefully sooner than later. Fortunately, we have very supportive web communities that help guys get the support and encouragement they need.

2. When did you decide to gain for the first time?

I accidentally first gained when I was 10-11 years old, as I bought and devoured junk food while on my paper route. I wasn't trying to gain but I got a little plump. I remember my best friend telling me that I looked, "a little pudgy" in a class photo, and I remember feeling all hot and bothered by his comment. Something about his comment seemed so exciting.

Dramatic lighting of first gain at 17

My first foray into intentional gaining was at 17 years, as a freshman in college. I was away from home, eating dining hall food, and I knew that freshman were supposed to gain weight anyway. It was the perfect time to try it. So I bought lots of fattening foods for my dorm room, and loaded up my tray in the dining hall. When I managed to get my dorm room to myself, I whipped off my shirt and inspected for growth. I used dramatic lighting effects to try to see fat... any fat... somewhere on my body. I found that with up- or down-lighting, it was easier to see the fat piling on. I started taking pics too, which was pretty risque back then because there were no digital cameras -- that means getting your film developed at the local pharmacy, where you know the film tech was giving you the suspicious eye. I didn't care though. I wanted to see fat on me.

Documenting first gain at 18

I lost interest in gaining after my freshman year because I was busy with classes and friends, and only returned to it five years ago. I had stayed fit all the years in between, even more so when I came out and tried to achieve that "gay-boy ideal" physique. The turning point was when I had reached an age and time in my life when I was just tired of trying to starve myself to maintain that physique. I gained 15 lbs the first year, but lost 10 over the summer due to increased activity. The next year I gained 10 additional pounds, and lost 5 over that summer. The weight continued to ratchet up over the next five years, to the 65 lbs I have now. Some of that weight is also muscle, as I continued to lift weights, particularly doing resistance exercises. Since resistance exercises use your body's own weight, the fatter I got, the more muscle I built. I highly recommend these exercises for aspiring gainers.

3. Did you get negative comments from friends and family?

Nope. My partner called me fat here and there, but then again, he called me fat when I was skinny and 145 lbs. It was his way of dealing with his own body image and small belly, so I really didn't take it to heart. But none of my family or friends have ever said anything. Some of my friends, especially those who I haven't seen in a long time, say that I look like I've "beefed up". That is where the muscle building comes in. If you gain muscle with belly, I don't think people focus so much on the gut as they do your overall build. Or maybe I just have super nice friends. :)

I get this question frequently, which tells me that it is foremost on the minds of aspiring gainers. And here's my response. If you care that much what your friends/family say about your hairstyle, clothing, hobbies, career, and sexual orientation, then you shouldn't be thinking about gaining. Gaining is for those people who are comfortable with themselves -- all aspects of themselves. In fact, most gainers who are proud of their gaining actually WANT to hear these comments, as an indication that their gains are noticeable. Get comfortable with being who you REALLY are, before trying to gain weight as well.

4. What is your goal?

Actually, I reached (and slightly surpassed) my goal of 200. I am now 210 pounds. I think its a great weight for my height (5'8"). It looks pretty good, if I do say so myself, and I am still quite active. Of course, the encouragers in my life want more, but that's nothing new. They always want more. Its important to set a goal weight for yourself and stick to it, knowing what is most attractive to you. You could always adjust your goal weight later on, once you get used to the weight and perhaps desire more.

5. What is your favorite part of being bigger/fatter? Your least favorite part?

My favorite part is the fat itself. I just love the soft, rubbery texture, how it jiggles when I walk, bounces on stairs, and wobbles around when I jog. I love how it looks in different light, sometimes round and firm, other times soft and dimpled. I think fat is a miracle substance, can you tell? :)

Another favorite thing about being fatter, which I hadn't anticipated, is simply that I take up more space now. Before, as a thin guy, I could get knocked around pretty easily on the sidewalk or in a bar. Now, I knock other people out of my way (not intentionally, although that does happen sometimes :) There's something very satisfying about just being bigger and making others go around you.

As far as least favorite, I would say its two things: having to regularly update the wardrobe to accommodate the growing girth (which can get expensive) and some of the physical side effects. With regard to the latter, I am referring to increased foot pain due to walking/jogging a lot and carrying more weight, and general flexibility issues (bending over to tie one's shoes with a big belly in the way is a bitch). On the other hand, these negatives can also be viewed as kinda hot too. :)

6. What do you like best about gaining/fat on others?

I love seeing growing fat on bellies, lovehandles, asses, thighs, all over. For me, I love to see the contrast, so I usually prefer seeing a guy just getting started on his gain, with a fit/thin body, and piling on the pounds. I find that much more appealing than say a guy who is already 300 lbs who adds another 100 lbs. But that's just my personal preference. Whatever the weight, my favorite gainers are those who document, in video and picture form, their gain. I can't get enough of seeing their progress. Conversely, the easiest way to lose my interest is for a new gainer to say they have no cam, webcam, videocamera, or phone with a cam. Puh-lease. Sadly, these are also the folks who later lament not taking pics as they get fatter, so they have no comparison. I think half the fun for fat admirers is seeing the progress, myself included.

7. What do you eat to gain weight? 

I tend to graze all day, eating the usual meals but snacking in between. I rarely stuff myself -- I don't have a huge capacity anyway, and I don't really love the feeling. Foods like peanut butter, ice cream, pasta, pizza, trail mix, chips and guacamole, mixed nuts, and beer are great for packing on pounds AND are generally pretty healthy. I have never chugged gainer shakes or heavy cream to gain weight, but then again, I never needed to. Even at 17, I was able to gain by just snacking a lot.Some other bloggers have posted recipes and ideas for putting on pounds, so I will defer to them.

If you want to gain weight, I would suggest keeping track of your calories in a spreadsheet so you know what you are eating. Too many guys think they are stuffing themselves silly with sufficient calories and get frustrated with the lack of growth. First, calculate your Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR), which is your body's minimum calories needed to sustain itself in a day without any additional activities. Then, add to your BMR whatever calories you spend in addition, such as walking to and from classes or work, working out, etc. For example, a male 20-year old who is 5'10, 170 lbs has a BMR of 1878 kcals. If he works out, and walks to and from classes, he probably spends another 1,000 kcals on those activities. That means he needs to eat in excess of 3,000 kcals to begin to store fat. If he wants the gain to be noticeable in a short time, he'll need to injest 5-6,000 kcals in a day. Fortunately, we have gluttonous fast food restaurants that make these high calorie amounts possible, but you need to keep track. There are now lots of apps for tracking calorie counts -- of course, they are designed to lose weight, but just use them for the opposite.

8. Have you ever been fed or fed others?

Yes and yes. Once you decide to jump into the gaining community, you will likely have an opportunity to meet with other gainers/encouragers. Sure, there are some flakes and weirdos out there, but most of the guys I've met have been genuine, fun, cute, and damn sexy. And there is nothing like getting your belly rubbed by a hot guy, or rubbing his hot belly in return. Food is almost always part of the meet-ups, as well as drinks of some sort. I've had basic meet-ups at a coffeehouse or bar or restaurant, or those that got a little more spicy with someone I knew well. Feeding is very sensual for the gaining community, and is well worth doing. Don't limit yourself to only online experiences... you are missing so much of the real thing.

9. Where do gainers/encouragers meet up?

Increasingly, beefy sites are promoting regular meet-ups where guys get together in a particular city for food and merriment. There is also an annual meet-up called Expansion that is a weekend getaway for big guys and their admirers. I've attended a few of the bar meet-ups and its been nothing but fun. They are very casual, social, and of course, eye-pleasing. I haven't heard any complaints about these events; rather, most guys seem disappointed when they are over and can't wait for the next one. I think that speaks well of them.

10. Do you have any regrets about gaining the weight?

None. Absolutely none. I thought that I might, but I really don't. My only regret has to do with clothes that no longer fit, and me regretting that I didn't buy a larger size initially. But do I miss being a thin, athletic, "typical gay guy"? Not at all.

And my guess is that you won't either.